1. You lose arguments with inanimate objects.
2. You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.
3. Job interferring with your drinking.
4. Your docter finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.
5. Career won't progress beyond Senator from Massachusettes.
6. The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.
7. Sincerely believe alcohol to be the elusive 5th food group
8. 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence?? - I think not!
9. Two hands and just one mouth... - now THAT'S a drinking problem!
10. When you can focus better with one eye closed.
11. Every woman you see has an exact twin
12. You fall off the floor...
13. Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.
14. Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger, screw dinner!
15. The glass keeps missing your mouth!
16. Bill Clinton starts to make sense.
17. Vampires catch a buzz after attacking you [also mosquitoes!]
18. At AA meeting you begin: "Hi, my name is... uh..."
19. You wake up in the bedroom, your underwear is in the bathroom, you fell asleep clothed. - hmm.
20. Hi ocifer. I'm not under the affluence of incohol.
21. Roseanne looks good.
22. Don't recognise wife unless seen through bottom of glass.
23. That damned pink elephant followed me home again.
24. You have a Reserved Parking space at the liquor store.
25. I'm as jober as a sudge.
26. You've fallen and you can't get up.
27. When hangovers become an attractive alternative lifestyle - please pass the ice pack....
28. BeerTender! Get me another Bar!
29. The shrubbery's drunk too, from frequent watering.
"Beer is proof that god loves us and wants us to be happy" - Benjamin Franklin
Im a [url="http://www.frappr.com/micromaticbeerfanatics"]MicroMatic Beer Fanatic[/url]! Are you?